White coat. Heels.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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