1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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