atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
