How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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