She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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