My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
