btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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