its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
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