Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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