break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
