How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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