It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
