I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
