holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
