i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
