My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
