Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
