careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
