The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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