I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
