Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
