ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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