you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I didn't notice because vodka
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
