dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
