I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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