Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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