Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
we're making bets on your personal life
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
