are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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