the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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