so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize
