And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I just had sex on a roof
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
