My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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