Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I want to have your abortion
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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