Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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