My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Randomize
