It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
