so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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