It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
