Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Randomize
