You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
