The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
