Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
