I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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