he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
