It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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