so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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