Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
