I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
