careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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