Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
